Breaking the Cycle: Domestic Violence in Airdrie and Cochrane and How Trauma-Informed Therapy Helps

The numbers just came in, and they're hard to ignore. Between 2020 and 2024, domestic violence incidents reported to the Cochrane RCMP jumped 59% (from 365 to 579 incidents). That's not just a statistic; it's 214 more families, more kids hearing things they shouldn't, more people carrying invisible wounds into their workdays, their relationships, and their parenting.

While this new research focuses on Cochrane, the patterns and findings apply directly to Airdrie and the communities we serve. New research from Shift: The Project to End Domestic Violence and the University of Calgary has given us a detailed look at what's actually happening in these small communities: the perpetrators, the patterns, and the moments where intervention could make a real difference. And as someone who's volunteered in victim services in smaller communities and now supports clients here in Airdrie and Cochrane, I want to talk about what this means, and more importantly, what healing looks like when you're trying to rebuild after trauma.

Small Communities, Big Impact

In places like Airdrie and Cochrane: everyone knows everyone. The rhythms of community life feel tight-knit, familiar, and comforting. Kids play together on the same sports teams. Parents run into each other at the grocery store. First responders are neighbours. Both communities are growing, both are within an hour of Calgary, both have that unique blend of rural acreage and suburban neighbourhoods. They're more similar than different.

That's actually why this Cochrane research caught my attention. When I read the report, I kept thinking: if someone had done this same analysis on Airdrie data, what would we find? Would the 59% increase be similar? Would we see the same patterns: two-thirds with prior incidents, three-quarters with prior charges, half with kids present? I suspect we would. The dynamics in these communities are remarkably parallel.

That closeness is a real strength. But it also means trauma doesn't stay hidden. When violence happens in a small community, the ripples reach further and touch more people than you might expect. The survivor's coworker notices she's quieter. The kids' teachers see behavioural shifts. The person who caused harm runs into people at Tim Hortons and feels the weight of it.

What the Data Tells Us About Domestic Violence Prevention

The research identifies three perpetrator patterns that matter for intervention:

Two-thirds had prior domestic encounters. Earlier incidents that didn't lead to charges but showed conflict. This is the intervention sweet spot, where a man might reach for help if shame isn't in the way.

Three-quarters had previous criminal charges. Violence doesn't typically start in intimate relationships. There's usually a history. The hopeful part: prior contact means there's already a door open to redirect.

One in five had no prior police contact. First-time offenders. A reminder that prevention has to reach everyone, not just those with records.

And the hardest number: 50% of incidents had children present. Kids who witness violence are at higher risk for behavioural problems and more likely to perpetrate violence themselves. Breaking that cycle is generational prevention work.

When Men Want Something Different: EMDR Makes Change Possible

One of the most important findings that doesn't always get headlines: many of these men want to be different than what they experienced. I think about the fathers who say, "I swore I would never be like my dad," and then feel the rage rising and get terrified. Or the men who recognize a pattern in themselves and desperately want to interrupt it.

That's where EMDR becomes essential.

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is evidence-based and clinically proven. It works by helping the nervous system reprocess traumatic memories, getting the emotional charge out of them so they stop triggering the same automatic responses. When a man who witnessed violence growing up can finally process that memory fully, something shifts. The old survival response (anger, defensiveness, control) doesn't fire as easily. The shame loosens. He can access different choices.

Here's what changes with EMDR:

The nervous system actually relaxes. When someone's been living in hypervigilance or rage, EMDR helps the brain recognize that the threat from the past isn't present now. Safety becomes possible.

The old story rewrites. If you grew up believing "I'm going to turn into him" or "I'm unlovable," EMDR creates space for something different: "I'm aware of my patterns and I can choose differently."

Relationships shift. Processing trauma isn't the end goal; it's the bridge to showing up differently with your partner, your kids, in your community. That's attachment healing in action.

How We Work With This at OBP

At Off the Beaten Path Psychology & Wellness, we see this work play out every week. We work with partners and fathers who are carrying intergenerational trauma. We work with survivors trying to rebuild after leaving an abusive relationship. And we work within the context of what makes Airdrie and Cochrane unique: the rural and suburban realities, the tight-knit networks, the way people bump into each other and have to figure out how to rebuild community trust.

Here's how we approach it:

We start by honouring the context. These are real people in real communities with real competing values: being a good provider and being present, staying connected to family and protecting yourself, wanting to be different and being terrified you won't be able to change.

We use a trauma-informed and attachment-based lens. We're not here to pathologize or shame. We're here to support healing, learning, and growth. We recognize that men and partners may carry trauma differently, and we meet them where they are.

We use EMDR when it's clinically indicated. We also work with Internal Family Systems, attachment-based approaches, and somatic work, but when someone is stuck in a traumatic response loop, EMDR can help them get unstuck.

And we don't do this alone. We partner with local services like SARVSS in Airdrie (825-806-6121) and CAVS in Cochrane (403-851-8055). Small communities thrive when therapists, victim-serving agencies, first responders, coaches, schools, and families work together.

What This Means for You

If you witnessed violence growing up and you're working hard not to replicate it: you're not alone, and change is possible. The fear is real, but people can rewire their responses when they get the right support.

If you're a survivor trying to rebuild: there are people here who understand your community, who know what it means to run into your ex at the grocery store, who can help you heal.

If you're a parent worried about what your kids saw or heard: early, trauma-informed support makes a measurable difference in breaking cycles.

The research shows us that intervention works when we reach people early, whether that's supporting someone after their first incident, or working with someone who desperately wants to be different than their past. That's where therapy, EMDR, and community collaboration come in.

The Bottom Line

The 59% increase is sobering and demands our attention. But it also demands we move beyond just responding to crisis. We need earlier intervention, people working toward change, protected kids, and stronger community conditions that make violence less likely.

EMDR and trauma-informed therapy are part of that answer. Not the whole answer, but a crucial part. Because people do heal. Families do change. And in communities like Airdrie and Cochrane, those changes ripple out and touch everyone.

If you're ready to begin that work (processing your own trauma, supporting a partner through theirs, or helping your kids heal), we're here. In partnership with you.

Local Resources:

If you're in Airdrie and need victim-services support: SARVSS at 825-806-6121

If you're in Cochrane or the surrounding area: CAVS at 403-851-8055

If you're experiencing family violence, intimate partner abuse, or are in immediate danger: Call 911

For EMDR therapy and trauma-informed counselling: Reach out to us at Off the Beaten Path Psychology & Wellness. We'll assess whether EMDR is appropriate for your situation and work with you in a safe, structured, respectful manner.

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At Off the Beaten Path Psychology, we provide counselling and therapy services to individuals, couples, and families in Airdrie, Calgary, and Cochrane, Alberta. Our team supports anxiety, burnout, relationship challenges, and trauma recovery. Contact us today to learn more about how we can support your mental health journey.